Saturday, October 19, 2013

“This is fun doing this together… thank you for coming along.”

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“This is fun doing this together… thank you for coming along.”
This past week on Wednesday I met a fellow retiree in the Mall.  We had connected a number of times over the years in court. Each of us dealing with individuals that were in trouble.  He is also from a ‘ministerial’ background – though not a minister now.
I asked the same question we all get in these first few years of retirement, “So how are doing now?”.
His answer is also some of us use to jokingly but honestly tell someone what the change has been like… and what we are doing now.  He said, “Really busy, I don’t know how I used to have time to actually go to work!”
I asked him another question that some of us ask honestly of each other as well.  We do it to see where we are in comparison to the person we are asking. I asked, “Do you miss what you were doing?  Would you like to go back to do it again?”
Without hesitation he stated, “Absolutely not.”  His forceful way to state what he felt was only given to me and not to others that might take it the wrong way.
I replied, “I know what you feel like.  Today I do what I want to, not what I have to…”
We parted not long after that short exchange to leave me to my own thoughts.
“… I do what I want to, not what I have to…” my own words rang in my own ears… and thoughts.  Is that really true Mr. Lincoln? Oh boy….
Looking after your 92 year old mother is not always easy – but it has to be done.  And guess what, there are few breaks.
Looking after a house and all that goes with that… changing seasons… up keep… making it better… absolutely has to be done. There are few breaks.
Shopping and daily personal duties that never seem to end… has to be done… there are no breaks.
My wife and I were in a grocery store after having done some other shopping prior.  She looked at me and said, “This is fun doing this together… thank you for coming along.”  I grinned… with all that has taken place over the years she has taken care of business by herself… with me escaping to other things.  Now we can do some things together.
But then since retiring I have been involved in more volunteer things than ever before… which takes more time.  Like today I am off to do Prison work in Toronto for the full day… then next week I will attend the closing of Kingston Penitentiary (KP) – all of it requiring time… actually much more time than I have to give away.
And all of these things keep me hopping from place to place with still more coming along each and every day.
“I don’t know where I had the time to go to work?” was my friend’s wording.
Maybe it is just the age and stage of life when the value of what you are is actually seen by others and they really need help. Or maybe it is something that my wife said, “This is fun doing this together… thank you for coming along.”
My blogging has been sporadic as of late.  Going from a daily posting to one that happens when I get time is unnerving.  The change is hard to adjust to when you have too much to say… but no time to say it in.
Would I go back to what I did before? Who would ever have the time to do that?  Who would ever want to change the things I am doing now for what was more difficult and at times horrible?  Not me on all three parts. I am Free…

Oh boy I just heard shuffling from my Mother’s bedroom… gotta run.  And I gotta be gone in 20 minutes – on the road again.
~ Murray Lincoln ~
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