Saturday, October 12, 2013

The Regrets of Getting Too Old Too Fast

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Misty Hollow Carvingwas launched in October 2008

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The Regrets of Getting Too Old Too Fast

In this past month I have been back in school again, taking classes each day.  I am almost paralleling my grandkids.  They are back at it with homework and so is their grandpa.

I am now in the process of study – doing the early stages of animation and character creation.  The hope is that I will be able to animate my own creations that I have developed over these years of drawing.  It is starting to become a possibility.

The joy that springs up with each class is hard to describe.  I love study and I love learning something new. It has been that way for a long time and never seems to stop. I hope it is there until the very end.

But there is a problem… I have aged and there may not be enough time to get it all done.  I am quickly scurrying toward the last days.

No. No. I am not sick and I don’t have a serious disease – other than entering my 7th decade soon – I am doing just fine.

But with the new computer program designs that have been developed in just the short few years of this past decade… new things are possible that were never possible before.  There is so much coming and so little time left to grab all of it and make it mine.

How do I explain it?  I have never, ever regretted my aging… and have always celebrated what and who I am.  But now the new is galloping ahead of me – or just in front of me… and I can’t quite catch it.  I am understanding it easily… but realized quickly that what is happening and the growth that is taking place is soon to be so great that I will not be there to see it all happen.

My grandkids will begin doing what I am doing and then continue to leave Gramps behind… Gramps can still do it… but he will be gone.  Dang it!

That idea being “gone” and not able to see the newest things that are happening is starting to make me shake my head.  I don’t want to go. I want to start all over. I don’t want to stop I want to keep going – Forever!

Now I see the deep desire that some oldies have for the need to discover the “fountain of youth” – finding it and then drinking from it or swimming in it might just make it possible to live on into the most exciting times that I will ever know – tomorrow!

But quickly and realistically you realize that it isn't going to happen that way. BUT I can do something now. I can start classes and begin study alongside the young ones.

In one class that I attended last week, the prof was just a wee bit older than my oldest grandson. He is so good at what he does and the way that he explains it… I can’t wait to get back to each class.

Better yet when I do what the young fella tells me to do I am blown away by what I can make or do or create. I am young again… and nothing can stop me now!

Today I am young again. Hey – maybe I have found the fountain of youth after all!!!?

~ Murray Lincoln ~

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