Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Transition No. 3 - The Lobster Story

Sharon read the story of the Eda LeShan. How fitting for our class to hear this at this time. I searched the Net and found the following account of this story…

Eda LeShan, late author and family counsellor, talked of an encounter with an oceanographer who asked her, “Are you aware that lobsters know when they have to de-shell? They get really crowded inside their three-pound shells and are terribly uncomfortable. And it is not possible for them to go on living if they stay in those shells. Their whole, hard shell comes off, and the pink membrane inside grows and becomes a harder shell and a bigger one. In the meantime they must go out to sea unprotected, which is very dangerous because they might hit a reef or a large fish might eat them.”

“At first it didn’t hit me,” Eda LeShan responded, “but then I realized that I have followed that philosophy of life always, and certainly it is my philosophy now. I go to the reef, even if it’s dangerous. You have to be willing to change. You have to become more flexible. You may have to face painful crises. Courage and a sense of humor are what you need. You know if you stay stifled where you are, you’re dead before you’re dead. You need to have the courage of the lobster.”

As Sharon read the story to us it hit home. I was a Lobster in so many ways. I have shed the shell and am now waiting for a new shell to form.

In the Lobster’s case this happens once a year and takes 72 hours.

In human terms the shedding happens with the losses that we experience. It may be a job loss, loss of a loved one, or the loss of relationship – you name it and someone has gone through it. We are vulnerable to the max during that time.

Perhaps for that reason we stay away from people and things.

Yesterday I met with a man that has just lost his wife. She was 63 years old. Six months ago they were living quite happily and moving toward retirement and a future watching grandkids grow.

A cough developed in November and wouldn’t go away. The doctor said it was likely bronchitis and another time it was an allergy. They finally took some X-rays and found that the mass was inoperable. Her appointment with the specialist is next Thursday…but she kept another appointment this week with her Master.

As he spoke of what had happened he shared that he just wanted to be alone. His daughters were after him and around him all the time. Grandkids were buzzing too. They all missed mom and grandma. His next words were powerful.

Murray, I just need to be alone and deal with this. Sure it is hard – but I will get through it. There is just too much noise in my house – I asked them all to go home.”

As we stood in the crowd of well wishers at the Funeral Home it was a quiet moment for him and me. For a second we were all alone in the middle of everyone. I nodded my head that I certainly understood. He smiled and said thanks, then he turned to the next group of friends that came to make more words and stand with him in this very busy room.

The one thing that is so powerful for me in the last weeks is the down time. I am not preparing the next sermon or running to the next meeting. I am off from being and doing. It is in this quiet time that I heal and rest. I accept it as a wonder of God.

Sure part of me wants to run and scream… but come to think of that… I haven’t had that feeling for days now.

I stop the Lobster story as he grows into his new shell getting ready for the next year – and wish him the best. He survived the long years and grows to about 5 to 7 pounds – then he is silly enough to go after the bait the trap… One success story was recorded lately – that big guy named Big Dee Dee was over 22 pounds. Good for you boy – that makes you close to 100+ years old.

But then there was the baity….that is another part of the story….

~ Murray Lincoln ~

Source Become a Late Bloomer

1 comment:

Brenda said...

You Always have the right story at the right time. Thank you for this.

God be with you & thre family involved today at the funeral.