Sunday, August 10, 2008

Getting Back the Giggle

When things go wrong and the world turns upside down you tend to stop giggling. The laughter that is generated is quick and then over. It is kind of like popping out of a cave to see the sunshine – then quickly retreating inside again.

Losing your position in life has that kind of effect as well.
Or add to that a loss of a life partner because of relational death – adultery does that in for sure.
Then there is the death of a spouse. Everything stops.
Humour can be quick and seem useless – even annoying.

Can’t these people see that I am miserable and I wish to be left alone in my misery? I am a miserable old f&#* - please leave me alone. Likely you won’t need to say that – it will happen after your first two reactions to their lighter spirits.

Yesterday I went for a long bicycle ride with my granddaughter. We went everywhere – probably covering about 20 kms before we arrived at her house – then I rode home. It was fun… she made me laugh and smile continually. Her pure smile and her silly statements were made for an old, unemployed grandfather that has lots of plans but not a lot of money (at the moment…)

I have watched the change this past week alone. The class I attended was made up of one Male (me), and one Female instructor, together with four more Female fellow students. For me it was a whole lot more femininity than I needed. At break times I wondered out and found a man to talk to.

At first it was very intense as each one described what they had been through. I was not as bad off as some of them. Some were moms with little kids and no jobs and no hope. Others were with very angry husbands that made life pure misery. There were not a lot of smiles or laughter – until the second day. A late student joined our class… she was a bubble about to burst. Her comments were very funny. She was alive.

From her very first statement she was afire... but others looked at her like she was nuts. Nope – she wasn’t. She was a young mom with three kids and had been turfed from a good job because she questioned the leadership of her boss’s decision. She had been hired to design brochures and other stuff for a popular business… she submitted them and then the boss – who was not a designer – changed it all to be her own design.
Her new boss likely couldn’t handle the fun in her.

By the end of the week we were all joking. I think it may have been this young mom – three kids and out of work – that had helped. It may have also been the fact that all of us took another look at the possibilities and then advanced from miserable to possible.

You may well be needing a boost from the ordinary misery that you sit in today. You may need to scrub up some attitudes… clean them off and then move on. I offer you one big giggle… then another to follow… once they take a hold…move on…

Suppose that you married people reading this suddenly are unmarried… for whatever reason. Read the Pick Up lines that Good Christians have developed – talk about FUNNY! Then if that doesn’t work try the YouTube links that is offered here…one will be only audio as the man describes what he sees….

If this doesn’t work – don’t call me… I will call you when I feel 100%. I don’t want to lose my giggle.

~ Murray Lincoln ~

Angry Lady Drivers -

Funniest Ever Angry Driver Beaten By Little Old Ladies

I found this in a Pastor’s page on the net…at

Christian “pick-up lines”
1. “Nice Bible.”
2. “Is this pew taken?”
3. “I just don’t feel called to celibacy.”
4. “For you I would slay two Goliaths”
5. “I would go through more than Job for you”
6. “You are perfect, except with all the sin.”
7. “You are so unblemished that I would sacrifice you.”
8. “Shall we tithe?”
9. “At points in my life I have been referred to as Samson”
10. “The word says ‘Give drink to those who are thirsty, and feed the hungry’; how about dinner?”
11. “I didn’t believe in predestination until tonight.”
12. “I believe one of my ribs belongs to you.”
13. “I went on a mission trip but all I ended up doing was mission you.”
14. “I can be your Boaz.”
15. “My spiritual gift is my good looks—it lifts peoples spirits”
16. “Is this the transfiguration… because you are glowing”
17. “Hey… I would work 7 years for your sister… but I would work 7 more years for you.”
18. “Hey good-looking, Ecclesiastes 4:11…”
19. “Marry me.”
20. “I’m one of the fortunate ones…Greek and Hebrew come pretty easily to me.”
21. “My favorite species of vegetation is the church plant.”
22. “Did I just have mud rubbed in my eyes?”
23. “Now I know why Solomon had 700 wives—because he never met you.”
24. “I used to believe in natural theology, but since I met you I’ve converted to divine revelation”
25. “I look after widows”
26. “Why don’t I have a Bible dictionary? Well, I don’t really need it.”
27. “Bathsheba had nothing on you”
28. “You put the ‘cute’ back in persecution…”
29. “Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from Gilead”
30. “How many times do I have to walk around you to make you fall for me?”
31. “How would you like to join my Purpose Driven Life?”
32. “If you say no, I will rip out my hair and my beard”
33. “Unfortunately I can’t perform miracles and I’ve only got enough bread and fish for 2 people.”
34. “So, my parents are home, you wanna come over?”
35. “Let me remove my sandals before I come any closer…”
36. “Let’s say, hypothetically, you were married. I would send your husband to the front line against the Amorites”
37. “It’s obvious to me that you sprouted from the good kinda soil…”
38. "Feel free to meet me at the threshing floor.”
39. “You can lie at my feet.”
40. “I really like your spirituality, it goes well with that shirt.”
41. “You’re totally depraved but I’d still like to go out with you…”
42. “I’m a proverbs 32 kind of guy and you’re a proverbs 31 kinda woman.”
43. “I’m interested in full time ministry, and not only that… I also play the guitar.”
44. “If we were around with Noah… then you, me… pair.”
45. “I arrange the substantial Christian section of my bookshelf into alphabetical order. Coffee?”
46. “Let me sell you an indulgence because it’s a sin to look as good as you do.”
47. “Not a big fan of your last name, but that’s cool, I can change that.”
48. “Solomon had 700 wives. You can be my 2nd girlfriend. But bring your friends.”
49. “Me. You. Song of Songs: the remix.”
50. “When I read Philippians 4:8, I think about you.”
51. “I would leave 99 sheep to come and find you… and then I would carry you home joyfully on my shoulder”
52. “Who’s your favorite apostle?”
53. “You make the Queen of Sheba look like a hobo.”
54. “I have familiarized myself with all 5 love languages, in fact, I invented 4 of them.”
55. “Let’s go for a ride in my Zondervan”
56. “I like to think that I’m all things to all women.”
57. “Have you died before? Because that looks like a resurrection body to me.”
58. “You float my ark."
59. “As Shammah the son of Agee a Hararite protected the field of lentils, so I wish to protect you.”
60. “You make me want to be a better Christian.”
61. “I will never give you reason to hammer a tent peg through my skull.”
62. “If you were a leper, I would still hold your hand—even if it wasn’t attached.”
63. “I would have asked you out to dinner, but I just put all my money in the offertory basket.”
64. “Hi, I’m Calvin. You were meant to choose me.”
65. “Unlike the Israelites, who forgot the Lord, I will remember your name most of the time.”
66. “I mentioned you in my testimony.”

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