The WNBR and the Neighbor on his Bike

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Today’s Blog Post


The WNBR and the Neighbor on his Bike

There has been a whole lot of Naked People riding bicycles yesterday. Wow! When I read about it first I was a little stunned to think someone would take their clothes off and actually ride their bike through a street of a city. But when I looked closely – there they were buck naked and pedaling!

This is too funny!

It is called the World Naked Bike Ride – or WNBR. It happens right around the world on June 12 each year since the early 2000’s.

Imagine, you missed it by watching the crazy World Cup Soccer Games. You missed it by sitting around your pool and lazing around your cottage. You missed it because you didn’t know about it. Imagine – you will never forget June 12th again – for the rest of your life.

Your neighbors were out riding and you missed it!

After reading about it this past week and checking out the places where it would be held in the Northern Hemisphere – I found that I could join in at Toronto and also possibly Ottawa. Though Ottawa wasn’t’ as clear where it would be. (I will leave Ottawa to two of my relatives, Perry – my cousin and Mark – my nephew.)

When I read about this I started to think more about how I might get the nerve to actually do this… and considered some of the ramifications if I did it.

Ramification first. These thoughts kind of stalled the process of preparation.

I am a retired minister that gets the occasional funeral to conduct on behalf of bereaved families locally. They call me to be involved in this difficult time. I try to support them by praying with them, then later standing in front of them to lead the memorial service.

If I was caught on my bike with no clothes on… the invitations to help with funerals might change. The same is true with the weddings and the special Nov 11th services that I am involved with.

Sheesh! Being all hung up with this Ministerial Stuff is a kind of a draw back.

Peterborough is only 75,000 people and most people know all the other people in some way or other.

When I was on the TV with my Spring Pole Lathe a few months ago it got the attention of hundreds of people. It seemed that the Spring Pole caught their attention. Carrying out a WNBR in Peterborough would draw more attention than my Spring Pole Lathe did.

But the thought persisted. Maybe I could do it after hours… way after hours in the dark.

Now the problem there is that when I open my garage door the light goes on. Now isn’t that a downer? I would have to get out my bike with the spot light on… quickly negotiate around some logs.. then head down the driveway. Too much danger of getting caught on something before getting away.

But maybe if I got the bike out before the sun went down then hid it around the corner of the garage… none of my neighbors would see that I had it out and ready to go. (Some watch everything we do – so I have to be careful.) Then at about Midnight I could slip into the back yard and fetch the bike, open the back gate quietly, then push it carefully down the side walk to the front…

Oh boy. My neighbors to the north head to bed at about 9 PM. Safe there. But they do have a motion sensor light apparatus that goes nuts at times when we move in our yard. Gotta stay to the south side.

The neighbors to the south are more of a problem. The walkway beside the garage goes by their bedroom window. And the man often sits outside at the front for his smoke before going to bed. I get sleepy after Midnight…. But it was dark… very dark on June 12th in our city this year. There was no moon at all.

Now just in case some of my neighbors have been aware and are watching the streets for WNBR folk… maybe June 12th is not so cool. June 13th might be better. Hmmm?

I did stand outside in my nothingness testing the resolve in my innards last night. I thought maybe I would run around the back yard to see how it felt. Ooops way too many lights at that time of night… and there was a faint smell of skunk too.

This has gone way too far for your imagination. Sorry about that… but then you did read this far… and have likely thought about this for yourself – you just never vocalized it.

Come on – be honest.

When you look at the Link posted below you will be thinking about the nerve that you would have to do this…. Right!? Come on…

Like one lady had painted on her naked back in the photo… “You were born naked… weren’t you?” kind of sums it up.

Now you are a church lady or a church man… and church people don’t talk about being naked – do they? I doubt that they even get naked…

Nope – not many times that I remember… clearing my throat a little… When they skip over the Adam and Eve in the garden part they point to the shame part pretty quickly… clear their throats and move on to the expulsion from the Garden part.

Recently a church man confessed to me that he has frequented the only Strip Club in our city (Recently it closed down). He was sharing with me about the number of men from our Peterborough Churches that had frequented the place with him. Some were good Board Members and Choir Members. Some he had attended Sunday School with. He was kind of justifying why he went along… it was a guy’s thing.

I thought of his account of the strip club and then the WNBR. I wondered if these guys would do it?

Why write about it? Especially on a Sunday and I am a minister…! Well you see… it is just really funny… and today some of you will talk about this over lunch… when you roast and toast the “going on” of different people that you know. I openly offer the other people relief of the roasts and toasts today… today you can do me.

And later… if you see a rather white streak(s) flying by your house, sometime after midnight… likely three or so older guys… it will be my neighbors.

Camera ready…

~ Murray Lincoln ~
http://www.murraylincoln.com/ 
POST SCRIPT
I didn't dare put any photos in with this posting.. Yikes! DO you think I am nuts!!?  Roasted and Toasted is one thing - but Crucified is another!
Source:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_Naked_Bike_Ride