Little Brown Envelopes make me shudder

Hokey Mokey… I hate brown envelopes from the Government!!! Admittedly some days they are okay with the odd little gift of money (my money) coming back to me. But not this week! This was one of those Little Brown Envelopes with not so good news inside.

Some of the paragraphs have sentences that are not nice at all.

“… This may result in an overpayment and monetary penalties being imposed or you may be prosecuted. Failure to reply may also affect your future benefits.”

I don’t know about you… but when I get a letter from my beloved Government that states they “may impose monetary penalties”… I shudder!

My beloved Government has for years imposed “Monetary Penalties” called Income Tax! Then my beloved local City Government has imposed a growing Property Tax on me that is nuts… and has almost doubled in 10 years time.

Then all those years of working and having PAYING INTO EI but never collected any EI – I had to collect it in the last 9 months of my working career! Sheesh!

Further “Monetary Penalties” is not something you want to happen!

PROSECUTED! Goodness gracious whatever for? I work with guys coming from Prison – they all were prosecuted and then spent time in Prison for the bad thing that they have done.

‘Prosecuted’ means you are guilty… and they added the words – “may be”…. Some assurance there – HA!

I can handle the “future benefits” part – I will NOT be paying into EI ever again so long as I should live… I am 65 and in Canada – they cannot make me pay again – EVER! I also have a small business – “Entrepreneurship” they call it… and you can’t get EI nor do you have to pay EI under that status.

But maybe – “future benefits” means my possible death benefit – that I will pay after I am dead???

I have 14 days to respond – before August 19! If not I am in doodoo up to my arm pits…!

There was a phone number that I quickly called… and guess what – I GOT THE ANSWERING MACHINE. Hey it is Government and the dear lady stated, each time I have called, that she is in but away from her desk. And I have found out in the two days now she is always away from her desk… or on the line to another potential person that might be Prosecuted. Maybe that person will share the same cell as me.

So you may be asking what I potentially did wrong… at least I hope you are.

I received my first Canada Pension Plan retirement benefit effective on May 1, 2009 in the amount of $516.96 per month!

I also received an EI check which is under the program called Self Employed Benefits – or SEB. Which is administered by the Provincial Government. Which – when I checked it out carefully with SEB – there was no problem with the CPP money.

I turned 65 on April 13, 2009. My EI ran out on the April 19th. Could I go to court over 6 days of over payment? No way!!!!

But there is a hiccup here. They did goof up terribly and now they are to pin the guilt on me… too funny really… except that it will take months to get them to admit it and I will be in EI Offices and calling mysterious EI people for months over this one. And maybe I will be dead by the time that I get this sorted out.

YOU SEE – HERE IS THE PROBLEM…
In January 2009 – my Beloved Government decided to give all EI recipients and extra 5 weeks of EI benefits. And in the first week of May I received a cheque from my Beloved Government that was not expected. In fact I had no idea that I was to get an extra 5 WEEKS of money.

I immediately contacted the EI office to explain what had happened. They had no clue. They checked my records and found that YES I was entitled to it. I was a Canadian that was unemployed. I was a Canadian that my good and gracious politicians in the Beloved Federal Government had bestowed and extra 5 WEEKS of BENEFITS on. YES INDEED I was blessed!

Hallelujah! God is Good and so is my Government!

Only thing is I was not so blessed about and I had a gut feeling in that first week of May 2009 – some how they are going to get me and I was not so blessed after all!!!!!! Don’t spend the money.

The SEB people knew about what was happening.

But now… I wait for a phone call… and wait and wait and wait… Each time the phone rings I jump.

So if any on this reading list – would like to pray for me – please do so. If any would like to laugh with me… please do so. If any would like a Blessing from your Beloved Government… well hang on – your turn could come.

I just hate being made to look like a criminal that could be PROSECUTED… and I hate Little Brown Envelopes!

My life is just too exciting. And if it could happen to anyone it will happen to me!

~ Murray Lincoln ~
www.murraylincoln.com