A Friend Request – by Bruce Lindsay

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Today’s Blog Post

A Friend Request – by Bruce Lindsay

I met a new friend. His name is Jim and his dog is named Lucy. He used to work for the power company up in Yellowknife, and has moved down here to retire. I’m going to meet him again tomorrow.

This is a story to encourage you to be friendly.

I used to think it was tough to make new friends. For the longest time the only friends I had were the ones from High School. I had about 12 friends. I was happy with 12 friends. I thought ‘That was enough’. If I went out I was happy to say hello to people, but I didn’t need them to be friendly, and I didn’t go out of my way to be friendly either, which worked out just fine, because I lived in Toronto. Most people aren’t that friendly. Most Toronto people talk to you in a courteous and professional way only. If you act extra friendly, they look at you funny. The only really friendly Toronto people are con-artists. Act friendly and people think you are up to something.

That was OK though, because I felt the same way. In fact, I can tell you honestly that I once met a man who seemed friendly, and we got along well. But then he told me he wanted to be my friend and I told him that I didn’t have time for that kind of thing.

I joined Facebook. But when people requested to be my friend I would say NO.

I moved to Peterborough 10 years ago and didn’t really have any friends here. I didn’t know what to do. I decided to force myself be more friendly. To accept that if someone was acting friendly, it was genuine. I would try being friendly right back, and accept their friendship.

I was at a grocery store and a kind old woman saw me shopping. She said, “Hey! You’re buying bananas. What do you plan to do with the bananas?”

I answered, “I eat them. I often put them in my kid’s lunch box, so they can eat them too.”

She said, “Do you know you can use them to make banana flavoured rice
crispy squares?”

“I didn’t know that.” I answered.

“Sure,” She said, “there are lots of different ways to use bananas. You should spend some time with me in my kitchen and I’ll teach you.”

So I’m in this lady’s kitchen. She shows me how to use bananas in about 12 different recipes. I made a friend. Her name is Wilma.

She lives in a nursing home now. But I still see her once in a while.

I went to the sportsman’s show when it came to town. I met a guy named Phil. We talked about fishing. He liked to hunt moose, I don’t. I like canoe trips and roughing it, he doesn’t. Still, he said. “If you only came to visit our hunting cabin up north, even for a few days, you would want to join our group and moose hunt with us.”

So I’m driving up north, somewhere west of Algonquin Park, with Phil’s directions to a logging road that leads to his cabin scribbled on a paper. And I have to be honest, I’m scared. I’m way beyond cell phone range. The directions say to go up highway 6 until it ends, then turn right and stop at the general store. In the store, ask for William, and he will call the cabin and let us know you are there.

Phil will come out and meet you with his 4 wheeler.

I wonder if it’s a trap. This William that I am supposed to meet might be an axe murderer. Or maybe the group of hunters is planning to kill me. I wonder if I ought to have a video camera running, just in case. Then maybe there would be some way to get word back to my wife and family what happened to me, although I doubt that anyone would ever find my body.

As it turned out, I had a wonderful three days in the wilderness with Phil and his friends. I never saw a moose, but the other guys got their limit.

Recently, I got a dog. A Jack-Russell puppy. We named him Sherman – like the tank. I thought my kids were old enough to handle it and help with the work. What I didn’t know was how friendly dog-owners are and how easy it is to make friends when you have a dog.

It is good for dogs to get together, to play and be social. My puppy looks forward to meeting other dogs in parks or trails and playing together. While the dogs play, I chat with the other dog owners. Dogs tend to behave like their owners too. Friendly owners tend to have the most friendly dogs. Grouchy, miserable people tend to have grouchy, angry, miserable dogs. So it’s good to stop before you get close to other dogs, and ask the owner if his or her dog likes to play. If they say “yes”, then let them go and have fun. If they say “No.” just be glad you asked, and keep walking on by.

Walking is the key. You don’t get to meet cat owners, because people don’t walk their cats. Cat owners are the ones who yell at you as you walk by and your dog chases their cat. “Do you think that’s funny? Do you think it’s funny when your dog chases my cat?”

Of course it’s funny. That’s why they do it all the time in cartoons. But I don’t say that out loud to the crazy cat lady.

Making a friend is not always easy. You might have to go out of your comfort zone and drive out of your way or get a dog and go for a walk. But if you want to make friends, remember you are not alone. High School is over. There are many people of all ages who want to make friends. Try it yourself. Be friendly. Accept someone else’s friendship with a warm smile.

I’ll meet you in the grocery store.

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Thanks Bruce...

~ Murray Lincoln ~
http://www.murraylincoln.com/